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Please, someone… anyone.. shut this fucking stupid bitch up now. I don’t care how you do it, just stop her from uttering another word on Eastenders.. I beg you! This is Chelsea Fox, aka Tiana Benjamin and is quite possibly one of the worst actresses to ever grace Albert Square.

Now before you call me a homo, no… I don’t watch Eastenders… its more of a necessary evil in my house. I trade 30 minutes of pain 4 times a week so that I get the run of the TV for the rest of the night. We’re in the process of moving out of the attic soon so at that point I will have my own games room and all is good again, but for now its an acceptable trade off.

Anyway, we’ve been home 6 or so months now (seriously..) so thats about 100 episodes of this shit I’ve watched (holy fuck.. thats 50 hours of my life I’m never getting back..) and since this introduction of this pituitary retard I’ve been hoping for her death ever since.

I know we’re in an equal opportunities world now and you have to employ a few “bad eggs” to even out the numbers but come on… what single cell organism did she evolve from?!

Imagine an actor thats Lennie crossed with Bubba from Forest Gump pretending to be Jimmy from South Park and you might just about have the perfect mental image of this “girl”s acting ability.

Not only can’t she act, she can also barely speak. “Acks” is a classic slur she does instead of “ask” that makes my piss boil and when she does chirp up, its like someone just poked her with a stick. Shit on my face and call me Susan… of all the suitable actresses for this part, how was she the best of the bunch..

The only thing I can think is they either didn’t advertise for the part and she’s related to someone famous, or they did advertise and she was the only applicant… ah default… how you’ve saved my own skin on many occasion!