Go away, and don’t come Beck!
FURY….BOILING….OVER……
MUST……WRITE…..ABOUT IT…….
FUCK! If it’s one thing, or two people really, that really get on my tits it’s the fucking Beckhams. How can 2 of the biggest pieces of cock wank have the nerve to ever be seen in the same place, let alone get married and spawn commercialism!
If you read this post and get angry because you like the Beckhams, then i’m not going to apologise. You can get to fuck!
If you read this post and get angry because I’ve got some information wrong or left something out, then I’m not going to apologise because, as much as I love writing for Delmorpha.com, I wouldn’t abuse my eyes and brain for revision on these pissflaps!
Now I’ve not always felt this way believe it or not. Step back to about 1998 and I could have even called myself a fan. I’m a die hard Man Utd fan (boos erupt) so David was almost a God back then, and his wife to be was in the Spice Girls….the Spice Girls were excellent! (No shit, I really was a fan and still have “Spiceworld - the movie’ on tape). However, David got himself a deal with Gillette and Brylcreem and a hair cut that every little mincey kid wanted to copy and all of a sudden he’s a fucking woman! His football took a back seat to his sarongs, bandanna’s and beads and he was actually one of the biggest gay icons of the time. Cunt! Posh was always a pouty fuck but when her and David got together and became “the scene’s hottest couple” she seemed to think sticking your lips out like Steve Tyler actually looked good. The tosser that she is!
So as soon as they were a couple, I was not a fan. But as much as I tried, and still try, to avoid them they KEEP FUCKING COMING BACK!!!!
- They had kids. Most people do. But most people don’t grow their little boy’s hair so they look like their homo-dad!
- David moved to Spain. Good riddance but they’re even more popular in this country after they’ve left it. Jesus!
- David moves to America. Ha! They’re welcome to him, but still photos in the paper of their luxury house in Beverly Hills and everything they do! I want to cry.
Now the latest thing that infuriates me is the people they hang around with. Will Smith and his family who are basically well spoken gangsters. Also Tom Cruise and Katy Katie Holmes* who are thick as shit and did you see him on Oprah that time??? What a fucking mong! What could these people possibly have in common? Is it that they all used to work in tele-sales? No! Did they attend the same school, if any at all? No, that’s not it. Could it be….. Of course, they all have money coming out of their stupid plastic ears! Times must be shit when you can’t even afford friends that you have something in common with. Wankers, the bloody lot of them!
I noticed, not read, yesterday that Posh is now teaching Tom Cruise to speak cockney because he ‘loves the language’. Shit in my eyes! What a pile of fucking monkey dung! This just goes to show the intellect of these fools! Is Tom going to return the favour by teaching Posh to be short and thick as a Pig’s Shit? It makes me even angrier that this article was on page three, not even in the gossip section. Maybe it’s my taste in tabloids but it still pisses me off.
The only good thing that came out of the mouths of these shits was about a fortnight ago. David says that they are so popular (cough..CUNT!..cough), and the paparazzi are so mad about them that he predicts that they will be killed much in the same way as Princess Diana was. Diana’s death upset me, she was a very good person. If this happened to the Beckhams, I would smile (because I’m very callous)….then probably bid for the wreckage on eBay. Ha Ha!
So if David’s premonition is correct then hopefully they won’t be in our faces for much longer.
What?…..
What the FUCK?!?!?!?!
Latest news states that top Premier League Football clubs are all keeping tabs on 8 year old Brooklyn Beckham who is now tipped to be bigger and more popular than his dad!
It’s official people, The Beckhams can be likened to the AIDS. Once it’s there, it’s not going away and it will make you feel sicker by the day.
Til next time peeps,
H.
